In the time that I've been blogging, I've seen it all; the good, the bad, and the not so pretty. I love blogging and being apart of a community, which for the most part, is so incredible and supportive. But I wanted to talk a little about jealousy and how to handle it, whether you feel it yourself or suffer the backlash from others. Girls are taught to compete with each other from birth. Just think how many times that you've heard "she loves herself" used as the biggest insult? Secondly, as bloggers, we are constantly putting aspects of our lives on the internet for others to speculate about. People talk. People judge. And perhaps the worst, people assume. We only offer facets of ourselves on social media and it's easy to piece someone together by their perfections whilst leaving out everything in between.
Nobody can deny that the nature of blogging has changed rapidly over the past 2 years. I remember reading blogs that were written by the everyday girl in her bedroom. Remember the days of a Boots haul with a webcam selfie and fuzzy lighting? It was the simplicity of it all that pulled me in. But nobody really wants to read about the girl in her bedroom anymore. They want perfectly focused images, with the perfect white backdrop and insanely high standard editorial content. In caring a little too much about this editorial standard I feel that we might lose some of our realism, which is what drew me away from unrealistic glossy magazines to blogging in the first place. Bloggers and Youtubers are the new breed of celebrity and it's crazy to think that what began for most as an innocent online escape has become one of the most influential forms of media on the planet.
Given these huge success stories and high standards, it's extremely easy to get jealous. I think most of us would be lying if we said that we don't all crave that online recognition. I'm not going to deny that running my blog full time from a perfect white bedroom stocked with pink peonies wouldn't be the dream. But I think I need to get back to being that girl in her bedroom a little bit more to remind myself of why I started my blog in the first place. These are some of my tips on avoiding jealousy and encouraging a more positive blogging community:
FIND YOUR NICHE AND RUN WITH IT
Don't feel pressured to conform to a certain layout, way of taking photos, and writing style. When you write in your own voice you become a lot more comfortable with what makes your blog "original". Find what makes you different and embrace it. The chances are that the times you try to write for the Popular page on Bloglovin, it will be a flop. Once you become comfortable with YOU, your style, your "niche", everything falls into place.
EMBRACE THE COMMUNITY
Blogging can get pretty self centred and egotistical. Taking the time to really interact with other bloggers by commenting and showing support is soimportant. If you're leaving comments because you want them back, people will know. You can tell from a mile off when someone comments simply because they want you to look at their blog and comment back. Don't be that blogger! Get involved, show the love.
DON'T GET SO HUNG UP ON NUMBERS
Everyone started from the bottom and it takes a long time to hit 1,000, never mind 10,000 followers. Don't allow your follower count to become a defining factor in your existence. Calling yourself a "small blogger", for that reason, is totally counterproductive. Be proud of what you have achieved and don't play it down.
DON'T TAKE THINGS TOO SERIOUSLY
Blogging should be something you do to escape the pressures of everyday life, not one of those pressures themselves! Remember why you started and have fun. Unless this is your full time job, does it really matter if you forget to schedule a post? Don't suck the fun out of what's supposed to be a hobby.
Self-confidence doesn't happen over night and I personally believe that it's a myth that anyone is 100% secure in themselves. Society constantly pits women against one another and is determined to tear us apart by our imperfections. The only way to overcome this is for women to make the conscious decision to hold each other up. Rather than allowing jealousy to consume you, let it fuel you to be the person you want to be. Being mean and catty on the internet is NEVER the answer for soothing low self esteem or a bruised ego.
So, that's my two cents! I want to end this on a note of positivity. There's always going to be negativity in blogging, but that doesn't mean you have to get sucked into it. If it's just you and your laptop vs the world, what are you achieving? What are your thoughts? How do you feel more positive about yourself and your blog? Do you ever give in to the green eyed monster?
Lydia Rose,
PS Don't forget to enter my giveaway to win a diamond dust infused Nicky Clarke hair straightener here!
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